Feeling sorry for myself...

I know that I have promised the ultrasound pictures but they are going to take a bit longer.  We have a scanner at home but not the program on the computer to accept the scans.  I'll figure something out and get them up eventually.
I am happy to be pregnant and know this is what I signed up for, but I have to say some days it's just not fun feeling ill.  Today for example I have a migraine and can't take anything for it.  Lying in a dark room helps a bit, but the pain also adds to my feeling nauseous.  Not fun!!!  I'm past my 3 month mark, shouldn't it get better now?
Really, I'm just feeling sorry for myself.  I know that billions of women go through this and many have it much worse than me.  I think I'm still adjusting to it all.  I think I thought I would have one set of symptoms that would come and then go, but I find everyday there is some new feeling I need to get used to.  And the food stuff.  One moment I really want something but within an hour I can't even look at it.  Last night I thought I wanted chicken balls so we ordered from Szechuan Szechuan.  By the time it got here I really didn't think it was a good idea but I forced myself to eat some anyway as I didn't have anything else to eat.  Today I don't even want to look at it.  Thankfully my Mom sent some soup and I was able to eat that.
ok...just needed to rant a little.
Back to my dark room I go.

And so it begins...

As you all know, Raju and I have been trying for quite a while to have a baby.  It has been a long and not always fun journey.  Last April after another failed attempt I lost hope and became very sad for a while.  At this point we decided it was worthwhile to get a second opinion which ended up in us changing doctors.  We took a break in the summer and spent it enjoying each other’s company and just enjoying life in general.  It was just what I needed to bounce back.  Our new doctor suggested some different things to try so in October 2010 we gave it another try.  November 1^st was our pregnancy test date.  I was convinced it had not worked as I was not feeling any pregnancy symptoms and had started cramping.  I went in for my blood work with a heavy heart and then waited at home for the phone call.  I had done so much crying that I just wanted to hear the news and move on with whatever next steps were going to be.  Imagine my surprise when the nurse called in a chipper mood to notify us that the test was positive.  I was stunned.  Unfortunately our happiness was short lived.  The thing about fertility clinics is they monitor you very closely.  Quite soon we noticed that things were not progressing as they should.  It was a roller coaster ride as some days looked bleak and others there looked like there might be some hope.  A month later we miscarried.  Fortunately, we had a trip to Barbados booked so were able to take some days on the beach to recuperate.  The other upside, was we were indeed able to get pregnant and strangely I felt kind of normal, as many women have miscarriages during their first pregnancy.

The holidays were good and with the New Year we wanted to get right back on the horse.  We had to wait for the laparoscopy procedure (which I blogged about) and then started immediately after.

March 2^nd……the dreaded pregnancy test date.  This time I didn’t really have a clue.  I had some symptoms but they are also side effects of the medication.  I prepared myself for the worst.  The nurse who called this time was chatty and I just wanted to get to the results.  POSITIVE!!!!

And I’m happy to report that this time it has stuck.  Raju and I will be welcoming our baby in early November.  I have been not on the blog for a while because I’ve been experiencing the joys of pregnancy aka nausea and fatigue and really can’t get up to doing anything much less blogging.

Today was a very exciting day!  I’ve had several ultrasounds, but Raju was able to join me today.  He was able to see baby flipping and being active.  I will included the progression of ultrasounds from the last 3 months in another post.  Today is also the day we graduated from the clinic and move to the Obstetrician.  Sally I am following in your path and will be at Sunnybrook.  Interesting isn’t it?  And also a November baby….hmmmm…..

Thank you all for your love and support through the years.  I am so happy to be sharing this experience with you.  Now I have to remember to maintain two blogs….my regular one and the baby one J